Thursday, July 2, 2015

Freedom Week





It has been two weeks since I left NYC. And at the beginning of this week it was starting to "get hard". 

Not feeling completely settled. Not fully having a place or space of my own. Not being mobile or "selfishly"-independent. All the while knowing that something has ended and something new is about to begin left me in a state of the awkward-in-betweenness (total clinical term). 

It is called Transition. And while I have known it before and I knew it was coming, I was having a difficult time just being in it. Why are transitions so hard? Well, because they aren't aren't exciting as going full-speed ahead. And they aren't as definitive as a complete stop. And they aren't in any way a manner of backward, reverse movement. 

Transition is the exact moment in-between. Between where you are, and where you want to be. It is only what is/where you are right now at this very moment. Which sometimes is a really strange, uncomfortable place. But its also not where you are forever... that, I had to remind myself. And for that, I am thankful. 

The time of transition has it's purpose and on a basic level, its to get you from point A to point B. 

So, there is a lot of transport lingo in this transition talk... no doubt as I think about "just getting my driver's license already", but there is also something else that is on my mind more and more as I'm here in my hometown. My friend's kids. One, because they are The Shit. And, two, because, no doubt, they are the best at just being in the moment. They do not worry about the future or what happened five minutes ago. They don't even care that the best moment EVER won't last forever. When they are playing, they.are.in.it. 

Yesterday, as I splashed in the water with a few of them, I didn't think about how far away my life in New York seemed or how scary it is to go into The Unknown. Instead, completely absorbed by the moment, I played with them and that moment. Later, I realized, that is total freedom. 

Happy Freedom Week to you. I hope you can just be in wherever it is you are and wanting to go.

xo,

M